Waiting

So we are now to the point in this adoption where there is a lot of waiting. Our agency has the majority of our paperwork for the dossier (large amount of documents that China requires for adoption)- other than a few minor tweaks to a few documents that we will be sending back to them soon.

We also know that US immigration has received our application for approval to adopt from China and are waiting to get the official approval back from them. We also have to get fingerprinted again. Kind of silly since we just had it done in August for our initial application for adoption (and fingerprints don't change), but what can you do. Obviously we will do whatever is necessary to get our child, but there are definitely some adoption related things that make you scratch your head.

In the meantime I thought I would answer some questions I have received lately:

1- There is more of a need for families for boys from China?
It's definitely a common misconception that there are only girls available from China, mostly because of the one child policy that has been in affect there until recently. I was surprised myself! This blog does a good job of explaining why there are so many boys to be adopted: https://mineinchina.wordpress.com/how-did-you-get-a-boy/
But, the basic rundown is that there is a lot of domestic (within country) adoption in China right now and healthy girls are definitely desired. Also, if there is a child born out of wedlock, the stigma that follows the parents is the same, regardless of the gender of the baby. Finally, there is a rise of birth defects in China due mostly to pollution and industrialization, so with the one child policy and the lack of social services, these children (regardless of gender) are the ones put in orphanages.



2- What is next?
We are currently on the list of families waiting for children from our agency. They get periodic updates (a couple of times a month) from the orphanages they work with in China with the children that are available. Since our home study is complete, we could be matched anytime with children with more "moderate to severe" special needs (i.e. spina bifida, missing limbs, or a combination of two or more minor special needs- cleft lip/palate and clubfoot, for example). Once our dossier is submitted to China, we are then eligible to be matched with kids with more "minor" special needs such as cleft lip/palate, clubfoot, treated syphilis, etc. Once we get matched, we have two weeks to accept or decline the match (although we have been very specific with our "child profile" with our agency so we're optimistic that we will not be declining), then we have to wait on some more paperwork (such as a LOA or Letter of Acceptance from China), then we can travel to China to get our daughter within a few months! The sooner the better obviously, but we appreciate the time to make travel arrangements!


3-Why China?
Well, we decided that international adoption was the way we wanted to go for a variety of reasons. Firstly, we are alright with an older child, not an infant, as are most common with domestic (within America) adoptions. Secondly, most domestic adoptions are very open, and being military and moving around as often as we do, we could not always guarantee that we would be able to give the birth mother the contact that she desired. Third, the timeline is very unpredictable with domestic adoption, as you don't know when a biological mother will choose you.

All that being said, we chose China because of the more predictable timelines (usually a year at most from application to completion), the criteria for adoption (ages of parents, length of marriage, amount of biological children allowed, etc.), the amount of children in orphanages and in need of homes and health care for their special needs, and the timeline for travel (different countries require different length of travel as well as amount of trips- China requires one trip of 7-10 days, which is ideal for Nick's schedule and our boys). In learning more about China, we are very intrigued by the rich culture, especially the festivals and hope to bring them in as part of our family traditions in the future.

4- Why are you adopting now? Why not have more biological children?
As I've mentioned before, adoption is part of my family legacy (my mom, uncle & brother were all adopted), so to me, it is a natural way to expand one's family and provide a home for a child who does not otherwise have one. I never had a negative experience with my pregnancies or anything, but I feel as though the desire to have biological children has been met by our two beautiful boys. and God put the desire to adopt on my heart. I have absolutely no "baby fever" right now, but would love to bring an older baby or toddler into our home. Obviously, adoption has its own challenges, but in my mind, they are less intense than balancing a newborn with our energetic boys. 

We also felt that now was a really good time for us to adopt, as Nick's schedule is very predictable with graduate school rather than the Army. So, we thought that we would take advantage!

5- Are the boys coming with you to China?
No, we are planning on leaving them in America with grandparents while Nick and I travel. Since it is a shorter trip, it would be a lot with the time difference and amount of travel involved. Also, this will be the first time we meet our daughter, so we definitely want to start out trying to attach with her without the distraction of the boys.

Well, that is all of the questions and answers that I can think of for now! We will continue to keep you all updated as things progress. Keep praying!

Moving Along

Things are moving along pretty steadily on the adoption front! Our home study was reviewed and approved by the agency and we have our official copies in hand!

Which means that I was able to send off two packages this week of paperwork, woohoo! One went to immigration, and that is the last piece of paperwork we'll need for the dossier (big packet of paperwork) to be sent to China. It is possible that this one piece of paperwork could take up to 3 months to get back to us, but we're hoping and praying it will be quicker. I've heard it has been taking around 3-4 weeks lately.

The other package was sent to our adoption agency and it was all of the rest of the paperwork to the dossier! If you're curious how much paperwork is required for the dossier, this is what I sent to be translated and ready for China:

My favorite part is the pictures of our family and house for our file:

The good news is, we are on our agency's family list for a match, so it could really be any time that we'll get a match with our child and have 2 weeks to accept! Oh, and almost immediately after I wrote my last update, our social worker got ahold of us and decided that since we're adopting a girl, there wouldn't be any real competition from our boys and the age range could be opened back up to 0-4 years old. So, still lots of question marks as far as age and when we will get a match and be able to travel and get her, but we are definitely trusting in God's timing and trying to be patient!

So for now, pretty much everything in our power is done, now we just wait on others to get things done. Still some work to be done as far as applying for adoption grants to help with some of the expenses though.

Thank you again for all of your prayers! We are all so excited to find out more about the little girl (crazy to say that!) that God is going to bring into our family!