I think I'm kind of still adjusting to "normal" life. I feel like my to-do list is a bit out of control. Its not even major stuff though. Just things like making a doctor's appointment and getting a haircut appointment. Not necessarily hard things, but its just the sheer amount of stuff that needs to get done that is daunting. And yes, I want to be busy, but definitely not stressed out. I think I enjoyed my vacation and the break from responsibility a little too much. And although we're a month done with this deployment, Nick is probably not coming home for another 8-9 months. I think I was still keeping hope that he might come home this summer, but he said he got his dates for September or October, so its looking doubtful.
Its all just a little overwhelming. I'm trying to pray about it as much as possible and trust that God is in control, but its just tough today. The loneliness, or lack of having my best friend around, rather, is starting to get to me. And I'm not really looking forward to my schedule changing at work, but theres not much I can do about that one either. I'm definitely a creature of habit, and I love "my kids", so its just kind of frustrating. I'm happy to help out, but apparently I'll be helping with 1st-5th grade...I don't even know how thats humanly possible. The special-ed teachers are trying to figure that one out (I'm just glad I don't have to!).
Unfortunately, Rufus isn't really helping my cranky level either. He has taken a "liking" to my pillow which is really obnoxious. And the kicker was that I came home today to find that he had taken my iPhone cord off the counter (from inside his pen) and chewed through it...awesome. Thankfully there's an AT&T store literally 5 minutes away, so I got a replacement. But, I had an excuse to go to my favorite Mexican restaurant, which is next door, so it wasn't all bad. But still, not the most fun. Oh, and Scout and I were snuggling nicely on our giant bean bag chair last night when Rufus decided to attack Scout, and got my face instead. OW! It hurt a lot and I have a nice little scratch on my left eyelid and a little swelling. Thankfully the swelling has gone down since last night and it doesn't look that bad. I love the little guy, but I'm really over this puppyness, espcially after 8 hours of work. And I was just thinking he could be trusted in the house... maybe not quite yet.
Ok, grumbling over. I think I'm just going to call it a day and go to bed early tonight.
2 comments:
It kind of goes in waves like that. You are fine, you are panicked, you think everything is under control, you want to curl up under the covers and hide from all responsibility.
It starts to even out a bit more the deeper you get into the deployment, I promise. And it is normal to feel like you do as well. Hang in there, we have a long weekend coming up!
I had one of those days today too!
Chocolate cake solved all my problems.
But, I am sorry to hear about your day. I hope tomorrow goes better for you :)
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